Saturday, March 5, 2016

Back to Work

A week and a half ago, my maternity leave came to an end. The past couple of months have flown by so quickly, and they were some of the hardest, yet also the happiest days of my life. That may seem like a contradiction, but I think any mother will know what I mean by that.


Leading up to the birth of my first child, I heard all about the challenges of parenting, and though I was a little apprehensive about it, I was pretty sure I was ready for it. Yes, I'd be tired, but just sleep when the baby sleeps, right? Sure, I'd have to feed the baby every few hours, but I figured I'd have time to get other things done in between. I thought I knew what was coming, but I really didn't. Not until it actually happened to me, and my days became one endless cycle of feeding and burping and changing the baby, with mere catnaps in between. Not until I had to face unexpected challenges, like recovery from a c-section and difficulty with breastfeeding. Not until I was tethered to my little apartment, only able to leave after extensive preparations just to make it out the door. In those early weeks, I was often tired—no, exhausted—as well as frustrated and overwhelmed.



But it has gotten better. Thank goodness for love. That's another thing you hear about when you're about to become a parent—the unconditional love a mother has for her child. I get it now. When I hold my baby in my arms, all I can do is stare in awe. I am mesmerized by her tiny features, her facial expressions, and her cute little coos. It is pure joy. When I look at her, I feel so grateful to have her and all the other bad stuff doesn't even matter anymore. So I am learning to cope with the challenges and enjoy the ride. I'm finally finding a rhythm.



So now it's time to get back to work. For me, that means not only returning to my 9-to-5 day job at the office, but also picking back up with the other things I love—drawing, knitting, baking, crafting. Between work, errands, and parental duties, it is becoming increasingly more difficult to pursue personal interests like I once did. The key will be to make a conscious effort to find the time, even if it's just a little bit each day. I've been finding ways to stay creative using my daughter as a new source of inspiration—making her clothes and toys, and photographing her every day. (Oh my, there are so many pictures, as you can see.)






These past few months have been a whirlwind, and I can't wait to see what else life has in store for me. I especially look forward to the day when I can share my love of arts and crafts with this sweet little girl. 



Till next time,
Niki



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